Love, Jimmie

So, did you know that it was against the law to drive with a headlight burned out?? Me neither! I mean, what would the world be without the random game of padiddle on the road?? Apparently, the Hendersonville police department is especially keen on ticketing folks with only one headlight. I’ll start at the beginning, because this is good.

Jimmie, Roxanne and I decided that we would have a movie date the night that Magic Mike came out on video, so we waited…and waited…and waited…and finally it came out, but due to our very busy social calendars (Editor’s Note: We are very busy and important.), it took us about a month to finally set a date that would work for all three of us. It happened to be a Saturday night after Jimmie and I got together with Felix, Ian and Rickster for Mexican. We decided that Jimmie should drive since I’d had a margarita (or two), so I left my car at the Mexican joint and hopped in the Hyundai with Jimmie.

Here we are, two fabulous women (Editor’s Note: hear, hear!) rolling down Gallatin Pike and having ourselves a good old time chatting away and catching up, when Jimmie stops right in the middle of a story and says, “Oh, shoot!” You can imagine my concern when she tells me she’s worried that she’s going to get pulled over. I knew she hadn’t been drinking, but then started to worry that maybe she’d taken up some sort of illegal recreational activity that I didn’t know about and had the goods stashed in the trunk. Now, imagine my relief when she tells me that she has a headlight out. I mean, people don’t get arrested for that!

Suddenly, I see flashing lights! They’re on to us! The officer strolled up to the window and shined her incredibly bright flashlight in Jimmie’s face and says, “You know you have a headlight out?” Jimmie told her that she was just noticing that as we were driving down the road and it looked a little dark off to the right. The lovely lady police officer took Jimmie’s license and registration back to the car and wrote up a nice little warning. That’s right…only a warning. This, right here, is where the big boobs and eyelashes come in handy, guys! Oh, wait…it was a female officer…hmmm…..Anyway, as she was handing over the warning, she explained that if we got stopped again, we could simply show the warning to the officer and let them know that we had already been stopped and they would let us off the hook. File that away…

And we’re on our way again. We finally made it to Roxanne’s house and watched this movie that would have been amazing if they hadn’t messed with a plot. Whose idea was that anyway?? I mean, who takes that much hotness and adds a lame ass story line. Who cares about a story line?? I mean, why am I listening to these people talk when I could be watching Channing Tatum do the sexiest worm I’ve ever seen? Or Matthew McConaughey…oh, don’t even get me started on that man… Yummy!

The movie ended, we wiped the drool from our faces and headed back to the restaurant to pick up my car. Hold your breath!

Drive, drive, drive, flashing lights, drive, crap! Stopped again! Jimmie obediently pulled into the next entry while pulling the warning out of the filing location. There was no batting of the eyelashes, smiling or flashing of the cleavage on this one, folks. Not a word was spoken; just the flashing of the warning, and the officer smiled and acknowledged that we’d been through this once already that night, and was on his way.

Twice…twice in one night…the officers in Hendersonville must have been having a good old time playing padiddle that night, because twice in one night?? Really?? I learned so much that night about replacing your headlight when you find that it’s out. Padiddle is not just a game that school girls play. It’s also breaking the law…but the abs were so…worth…it….

And please tell me that you fixed your headlight! (Editor’s Note:  Of course I did!  I fluttered my eyelashes at the boys at Auto Zone and viola!  Headlight fixed. I’m so rad.)